To download a pdf file of this lesson, please click here.

Lesson #3                      It’s All About Me, Is It?                 As an Attractive Christian Woman

 

          Perhaps your first thought when you saw the word “attractive” embraced outward appearance. It is true statistically that Americans spend $89.7 billion annually on beauty products, (2024). The cosmetic industry is growing and is supposed to reach $688.89 billion in 2028.  As staggering as those figures may be, spending time and money on one’s physical attractive-ness is an age-old concern.

          More recent history, i.e., 1950’s-1970’s A.D. one television show in particular aired the dialogue between a teenager and his mother. The young man was preparing for his first date. When he was asked what he was going to wear, he told his mother, “I want to look PRESENTABLE.” Seemingly, and in my opinion, that type of concern is seldom heard anymore. Generally, people are not so concerned about how they PRESENT themselves in public.

           Ancient history reveals the use of powders, creams, lotions, liquids, perfumes, gold, silver, ivory, precious gems, and even makeup for skin and hair as being quite in vogue. Every ancient culture, e.g., Greeks, Romans, Egyptians, Syrians, et.al. had their history of cosmetics.  The Etruscans, (900 B.C.-27B.C.) bridged some cultural differences including the use of cosmetics between the Greeks and the Romans.  

          From a biblically historical standpoint you may be familiar with city-name recognition of places like Samos, Corinth, and Rhodes. The Greeks imported skin and body makeup from these areas. They later reached into the Near East for their products.

          Regarding Bible references and especially the societies of the early years after creation we first look at the times of the prophet Jeremiah 4:30,

 

“And you, O desolate one, what will you do?

Although you dress in scarlet,

Although you decorate yourself with ornaments of gold,

Although you enlarge your eyes with paint,

In vain you make yourself beautiful.

Your lovers despise you.

They seek your life.”

         

          Add the words in Esther 2:12,

“Now when the turn of each young lady came to go into King Ahasuerus, After the end of her twelve months under the regulations for the women—For the days of their beautification were completed as follows:

Six months with oil of myrrh

And six months with spices and the cosmetics for women—"

         

          Then turn to Isaiah 3:24,

“Now it will come about that instead of sweet perfume

There will be putrefaction.

Instead of a belt, a rope.

Instead of well-set hair, a plucked-out scalp.

Instead of fine clothes, a donning of sackcloth.

And branding instead of beauty.”

          In the NT we are warned about the outward appearance as not taking precedence or having priority over our inner appearance. How can one SEE an INNER appearance, you may ask? That is what this lesson is about. The apostle Peter answers, 1 Pet. 3:3, “Your adornment must not be merely external braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses.”

          The apostles John and Paul include, “For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world,” (1 Jn. 2:16) and “Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments,” (1 Tim. 2:9).

          We are reminded by Solomon as to what outward physical sensational-ism can do. To the naïve man this king wrote, Prov. 6:25, “Do not desire her beauty in your heart, nor let her capture you with her eyelids.” As a godly woman it is up to you, not necessarily to dress down, but to realize the vulnerability and sometimes defenselessness of the man (Read Prov. 7:1-27 and discuss) ___________________________________________ ___________________________________________________

          Let us see just how a Christ-like woman can make herself both physi-cally and spiritually ATTRACTIVE ~

1.       It is not wrong to be physically beautiful – The Bible is replete with passages on good looks; but there are warnings about natural charm. E.G., Prov. 31:30, ESV, “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”  As stated, being outwardly attractive is not a sin. It is just that it pales in comparison to the heart; yet outward physical appeal is biblically discussed. __________________________ ___________________________________________________

          a.       Read Song of Solomon 1:15-16; 2:10. This is allegedly the bride confessing her love for her husband. How are these words descriptive of the physical appeal between the two? _____________________________ ___________________________________________________

          b.      Read Song of Solomon 4:7, “You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.”  Do you think this is the main intent of this text? What else might it include? _____________________________ ___________________________________________________

          c.       To whom was King Solomon referring in Prov. 3:15, “She is more precious than rubies: and all the things thou canst desire are not to be compared unto her?

• In order for us to understand this reference it was necessary for him to use which words to describe her? ____________ _________________________________________
• Were these appropriate words? ____________________ _________________________________________

          d.      As a godly woman have you considered the emphasis placed upon your beauty and relationship to the Lord as described in Gen. 1:27, “And God created man in His own image, in the image of God created He him; male and female created He them”? _______________________ ___________________________________________________

         

2.      It’s All About Me, Isn’t It, because I am held responsible for making myself appealing inwardly and therefore pleasing to my Lord?

          a.       As a Christian woman you are attractive and presentable because your heart reflects what, Prov. 27:19, “As in water face answereth to face, so the heart of man to man.”? _________________________________

        b.      As a godly Christian you have the responsibility to manage your own life as well as considering the possible influence of those around you. In so doing you may have effect on people who are not as strong as you.

• 6:25 reads, “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?” This text puts in proper perspective the godly woman’s priorities. How so? ___ _________________________________________
• How do you handle “anxiety concerning life, food, drink, body, attire?” ________________________________ _________________________________________
• How might you help others with the similar circumstances? _________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________

          c.       Again, you control the WHY of It’s All About Me, Isn’t It? At 2 Cor. 4:16 Paul penned, “That’s why we are not discouraged. No, even if outwardly we are wearing out, inwardly we are being renewed each and every day.” List ways in which you are “renewed every day.”

• _______________________________________
• _______________________________________
• _______________________________________
• _______________________________________
• _______________________________________

          d.       What do you think, as a Christian woman is required of your heart? See the beatitudes at Matt. 5:8, “Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.”  ______________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________________________

3.      You should be concerned about how God sees you – No matter if you are a physically beautiful woman, a loner, a wife, a mother, a working girl, a widow, a socialite, self-sufficient or any possible combination of these things, your primary concern as a Christian woman is how God sees you.

          Have you heard the cliché, “I’ve got my eye on you!”?  This may come from a friend, male or female. It may come from one who is in charge, e.g., parents, guardians. The point is someone is “watching you.” You may or may not like it; but as a Christian woman God, as well as those whom you influ-ence are watching you.

          a.       In the following scriptures find words and phrases that describe what God sees in any of us:

• 138:8, “The LORD will perfect that which concerneth me: thy mercy, O LORD, endureth for ever: forsake not the works of thine own hands.” ______________________ __________________________________________________________________________________
• 139:14, “I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.”  ________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________
• 1 Sam. 16:7, “But the LORD said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the LORD seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart.”  __________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________
• 3:11, “He hath made everything beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.” ______________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________
• 5:8, “But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.”  __________ __________________________________________________________________________________
• 2 Cor. 12:9, “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”  _________________ __________________________________________________________________________________
• 2:10, “For it became him, for whom are all things, and by whom are all things, in bringing many sons unto glory, to make the captain of their salvation perfect through suffe-rings.” ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

1. Discuss the lyrics of the hymn Watching You, composed by John M. Henson:

• “All along on the road to the soul’s true abode, There’s an Eye watching you; Ev’ry step that you take this great Eye is awake, There’s an Eye watching you.
• “As you make life’s great flight, keep the pathway of right, There’s an Eye watching you; God will warn not to go in the path of the foe, There’s an Eye watching you.
• “Fix your mind on the goal, that sweet home of the oul, There’s an Eye watching you; Never turn from the way to the kingdom of day, Ther’s an Eye watching you.
• “Watching you, watching you, Ev’ry day mind the course you pursue; Watching you, watching you, There’s an all-seeing Eye watching you.” ____________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

4. Your attributes and godly traits are to be acceptable and appreciated – Fill in the blanks of the following verses and discuss them with the class:
5. “Her __________ she hath opened in _________, and the law of ____________ is on her ___________.” (Prov. 31:26) Are these things a part of your godly woman characteristics that others note about you?
6. “An excellent _________ who can find? She is far more ____________ than _____________.” (Prov. 31:10) What would others see, what does God see in your jewelry box? _________________
7. “You shall be a crown of ___________ in the hand of the Lord, and a ____________ __________ in the hand of your God.” (Isa. 62:3). This is speaking of the salvation of Zion. What does it say of your own personal salvation? ______________________________________
8. “To grant to those who mourn in Zion – to give them a ______ ___________ headdress instead of ashes, the oil of __________ instead of mourning, the garment of ___________ instead of a faint ________; that they may be called ___________ of ______________________, the planting of the Lord, that he may be glorified.” (Isa. 61:3). As an attractive, godly, Christian woman, which of these attributes describe you? Do they all? Just one or two? ________________________________ ___________________________________________________
9. “God is __________her, she will not fall; God will ________ her at break of day.” (Psm. 46:5). How do you start your day? How does Gal. 2:20 help us with this Psalms passage? “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” ________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________________________
10. “A woman of __________ grace gets __________...” (Prov. 11:16, MSG The Message, Bible Version).
11. In speaking of deacon’s wives, “…the women are to be worthy of ___________ not malicious ________________ but ____________ and ____________ in everything.” (1 Tim. 3:11).

          The above scriptures help us to see the true beauty and attractiveness in the Christian woman.

5. We cannot leave this section without some reference to examples of beautiful and attractive women in the Bible.
6. As we have noted women like Esther are renowned for their physical beauty. E.g., Est. 2:7, “…Esther, the daughter of his [Mordecai] uncle, for she had neither father nor mother. The young woman had a _____________ figure and was ______________ to look at …”
7. E.G., Sarai, “When he [Abraham] was about to enter Egypt, he said to Sarai his wife, ‘I know that you are a woman ________________ in _________________.’”
8. There are those who are not necessarily identified as being physically attractive, although they may well have been. They are remember-ed more for their inner beauty.

• g., “Then Hannah prayed and said, ‘My ____________ _________________ in the Lord; in the Lord my horn is __________________ high. My mouth boasts over my enemies; for I ____________ in Your deliverance.”
• “And now, my daughter, don’t be afraid. I will do for you all you ask. All the people of my town know that you are a ______________ of ______________ character.” (Boaz to Ruth in Ruth 3:11)
• “In Joppa there was a disciple name Tabitha…she was always __________ good and ____________ the poor.” (Acts 9:36)

         

          The Godly, Christlike woman is beautiful as was Hannah, Ruth, and Tabitha. It is not sinful to be physically appealing, but it should not be above the beauty of the inner woman.  Having studied the above, now do you feel you are an example of a Godly Christian woman regarding your pleasant appearance?___________________________________________ ___________________________________________________